Many parents worry about their children’s future. Some take their child to numerous extracurricular activities beyond school to shield them from gadgets and the internet. Others prioritize getting good grades to make it easier to get into university later on.
And some advocate for homeschooling or individual education, being opponents of the system.
In this article, we’ll discuss whether there is value in today’s education, what to do if a child doesn’t want to study, and also what we can learn from our children and what we can give them ourselves.
What We Can Learn from Teenagers
The next generation is always more advanced both energetically and vibrationally. From this perspective, any representative of the older generation is more rigid.
We have to make an effort, work on ourselves, just to match the level they are at without doing anything special.
Because they are fine with their self-worth, they are fine with being themselves, they are fine with self-love and boundaries. But to reach such a state, we would need to dance with a tambourine and spend years digging up and healing our traumas.
The older generation grew up in completely different vibrations and energies, and they transmitted all of that.
That’s why teachers in schools pressure teenagers.
See also: Why it’s important to build a trusting relationship with your teenage child
How to Convey the Value of Being in School to a Child
Question: “How do you negotiate with an 8-year-old child that they need to study and do their homework?”
Who needs this? An agreement is when both parties consent, but you are trying to force them to do something they don’t need.
Children listen to those who project their power – not from authority or your age. They hear the power you emit from within.
If you have learned to emit this power, great. But many adults today were “semi-finished products” in their youth.
Have you conveyed the value of learning? Do you know what the value of being in school is? If not, you cannot convey the value of being in school because there is no value there. How can you convey something that doesn’t exist?
Children only do what they want to do. When you start doing the same for yourself, their tantrums will stop bothering you. When you stop pressuring the child, they will happily sit down to do their homework. The more you push, the more resistance you get.
When you sit down to write out why you can’t just leave the child alone and allow them to do what they want, you will learn a lot about yourself.
Sit down and write: “I don’t allow myself to do what I want,” “I think I should do this and that, live up to that,” “It’s important to me what the teacher at school says, ‘what if I get called to the principal’s office’.”
Everything starts with you. When you pull all these strings out of yourself, the child might very well happily run to do their homework because mom has stopped pressuring.
Is It Okay to Let a Child Skip School Sometimes?
It is necessary to allow a child to skip school from time to time. This is a matter of your agreements with the child.
When a child gets tired of school, they get sick. A runny nose and a fever are often symptoms that the child is exhausted and doesn’t want to go to school.
No matter how great the system is, you need to take a break from the system.
You are learning to negotiate with your child. The child must understand that they are not getting a break from school just because they feel like it.
For example, you give your child the right to take one day off from school per month – at their own discretion. At the same time, you agree on conditions that will prevent the possibility of “abusing” this right.
See also Relationships with Children. What is the responsibility for a child from a spiritual perspective
Do school and university provide knowledge. Who needs higher education
We have a lot of hang-ups in our heads regarding children’s education.
For instance, if you are preparing your child for an office job or for them to hold some corporate position, then grades, education, and so on are needed.
My daughter didn’t go to school for knowledge, but for socializing. I needed my child to communicate at school, to socialize. That was my goal for attending school.
Because you can’t really get much knowledge at school, only if you need grades for admission and you see that as the goal, then it makes sense to negotiate and talk with your child.
I didn’t see the point in that; we weren’t applying anywhere. Getting a profession and learning to earn money is not about getting into university. That’s my personal opinion.
My daughter never saw her mom at a traditional job. When she started first grade, I quit my job, and in her memory, the time when I went to work from 9 am to 5 pm never stuck.
Moreover, when she started talking about wanting to go to university, Maris told her: “Do you want to work for others, or do you want others to work for you?”
She doesn’t have the thought in her head that she could go work for someone as an employee. And if you don’t work for someone, higher education is your personal business, because nowadays you can learn anything through online courses.
And when you have a clear understanding of who you want to be, you simply choose what you need.
It’s impossible to choose a profession at 17-18 years old, when a person doesn’t even know who they are yet, and they haven’t separated from their parents.
Growing children need to set sail on their own and explore many different things.
For this, adults must give their children freedom and place responsibility for themselves into their own hands, despite the fact that children don’t always want to take that responsibility.
I have never studied as much as I have in the last 10 years. I have developed so many skills, from websites, marketing, promotion, organization, and not one of them required studying at a university.
So if you only see your child as an employee, and that is your ceiling, that’s also normal. Not everyone is meant to be an entrepreneur; not everyone is meant to take on responsibility. But you can instill this in your child.
We kept the door open while she wanted to apply. Now the task is to learn how to support herself; everything else is secondary. Your family may have different values and different goals.
See also Modern Children and Social Adaptation
The Foundation for the Transformation of the New Generation. What You Gave Your Children
I am very glad that now more young people are appearing on our project. There is an older generation that has walked hand in hand with the Keys for many years, and now they already have adult children.
Despite the mistakes we ourselves made in parenting, I had them too, but overall, our children are more well-adjusted compared to when we grew up in a time of scarcity and everything else.
They have different values, different perspectives, and a different foundation of experience, and some of it we laid down ourselves from the start.
For example, for me, it was important when parents separate and the child stays with the mother, I thought about what lesson or gift I wanted to pass on to my child. To separate and be free, or to live together for life, tolerating each other, betraying ourselves, and passing on the grandparents’ program to the child.
You did the same thing. Everyone has their own thing, for some it’s values related to money, for others it’s working for yourself instead of a 9-to-5 job.
Don’t look at how many mistakes you made in parenting, but what you gave. You gave infinitely more in terms of freedom, self-understanding, and the opportunity to realize yourself.
For example, I sometimes feel proud of both the journey and the results achieved over these years. It was hard, there was no wizard who flew in and saved everyone. We worked, we dug out, we uprooted these limitations and traumas from ourselves.
And thanks to this, among other things, the younger generation has the opportunity not to have to work through all of this, because there is no point in repeating what we went through.
And is it important to you that your child gets a higher education? How do you feel about the education system, do you allow your child to sometimes skip school?
The article is based on broadcasts from the #conversation_on_the_couch #102 Transmitting the State, #103 Free Topic, #13 Three Foundations in Raising Children, #91 Men. Relationships. Complaints