I can’t resist… sharing Alina Panova’s article “How to Ruin Your Life? Bad Advice.”
Some will smile, while others will seriously reflect…
There are countless ways to live a long and happy life in this world, but for some reason, the vast majority of the Earth’s population stubbornly ignores them. It seems that many of us quite deliberately ruin our lives and achieve tremendous success and even, oddly enough, amazing heights in this endeavor. As a result of investigating this mystery, this article has gathered time-tested ways to become unhappy, eternally whining, and dissatisfied creatures.
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So, let’s begin our top-5 bad advice on how to ruin your life.
Advice 1. Do what you don’t like.
Work at a job you hate, crochet if the mere sight of knitting needles makes you sick, hang out as often as possible with that friend whose constant whining gives you a headache. You will undoubtedly strengthen your willpower and gain a reputation among your acquaintances as an incredibly patient and courageous person.
Judging by some people, the halo of martyrdom is their main reward. And for the hundredth time, in response to your school friend’s complaints and lamentations about her young, wasted life, you will grit your heart and grind your teeth and say, “Yes, you’re amazing! I couldn’t do that,” thereby undoubtedly soothing her sick ego, thirsting for praise and consolation.
Of course, an uninteresting job with low pay and a snake-pit of a team, or a husband prone to violence, can be endured for years out of both fear and habit – the old habit of everything bad. But are both excuses suitable for an adult who can weigh all the pros and cons? Apparently yes, since such a large number of people in the modern world continue to do what they deeply detest, for reasons they themselves barely understand.
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If you feel stuck, your days are joyless and boring, it means you haven’t yet found your purpose.
Advice 2. Whine and complain about life more often.
Even if you fail to feel deeply unhappy, life-beaten, or a spiritual wreck after diligently following Advice 1, don’t despair. We still have foolproof methods just for you.
Woke up early in the morning, the sun is shining, birds are singing, and your heart is reaching for a cup of hot coffee, a light breakfast, and labor for the good of society? No, that’s absolutely not right! Quickly go to the mirror. Done? Good, now look at your reflection and try to put the most tearful expression on your face. If it’s hard, remember the face you usually make when asking to leave work early under the pretext of a “terrible headache.” There, that’s better!
Now, when the mirror reflects an unhappy, unsmiling, and life-beaten creature, amplify the effect with lamentations and complaints for any reason or no reason at all. The bird is singing loudly, the sun is shining right in your eyes, and you don’t like the heat anyway? Excellent, you’re on the right track! Rate the quality of your coffee as a “fail,” look at your breakfast with deep suspicion, and check the expiration date on your cottage cheese while recalling every case of food poisoning involving your acquaintances. You can also read forecasts of economic downturns and global catastrophes.
Charged up with positivity? Time to go to work. Don’t forget to wear the tightest, most unbroken-in shoes, jostle in public transport, complain about the economic crisis when you get to the office, and spend half your lunch break reminiscing about how a certain X betrayed you back in eighth grade, and how someone was rude to you in a bank queue 10 years ago. Undoubtedly, such a trip down memory lane will boost your mood and productivity.
Tip 3. Judge.
This follows logically from Tip 2. If we start complaining about life, we always eventually find someone to blame. The government, society, the evil head of the receiving department, or the parents who gave you life – that’s the true source of all troubles. Dissect the “culprit” piece by piece, focus on the tiniest flaws, and unleash a “grapes of wrath” upon their head. By the way, if you manage to get genuinely irritated, it will work even better.
If you’re not very good at it yet, don’t despair! Remember those relatives or acquaintances in whose company you feel most uncomfortable. Pay them a visit, and you’ll have the time and opportunity to judge everything happening around you together. And yes, don’t forget to use strong negative epithets and negatively charged words, otherwise all your hard work to turn your own life into a nightmare might go to waste.
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Judgment is a scourge for spiritually advanced people. The more a person knows about how things should be, the harder it is for them to stay in the observer position and not compare people’s lifestyles with the “standard” they’ve created themselves.
Tip 4. Be late and forget.
Have you ever noticed the look on the face of someone who tries to get everywhere on time but always arrives too late? Or the confusion of so-called scatterbrains who constantly forget the most essential things when heading off on a long-awaited vacation? Ruin every day of your life with perpetual lateness and amazing forgetfulness! Then you’ll never be in the right place at the right time, and even if you are, those around you will always find something to scold you for.
Late for a meeting with an important client, forgot your documents at home? Way to go! Arrived at work half an hour after your boss? Forgot about your doctor’s appointment and now have to apologize and reschedule? Absolutely fantastic! If you can also manage to constantly feel guilty, that will have a double effect, and your goal will be achieved much faster.
Tip 5. Ruin your relationships with those who are dear to you.
Do you have a best friend, a caring family, a loved one, and a wonderful boss? Do you feel good and cozy in their company? That is absolutely no good! And have you never wondered how they actually feel about you? Don’t you think your boyfriend was staring a bit too intently at your best friend a week ago, and that your mom criticized you too often when you were a child? Aha! Maybe it’s starting to seem that way?
Remember all the small grievances and arguments, build a bonfire out of them, and fan the flames of bad memories.
Nitpick over little things. And anyway, are these really little things—that yesterday your signature onion soup wasn’t showered with praise, and for your birthday you were given a Persian kitten instead of signature JLo perfume? And why did you have to be the one to litter train the kitten? And by the way, you wash the dishes in the house much more often than everyone else.
Practice this kind of petty nitpicking every day for five minutes. Voice your complaints in a raised tone, personally blame the offender, and draw conclusions about their moral character. If they try to meet you halfway and put an end to the argument, immediately slam the door and go sit in deep solitude. After all, if you manage to ruin your life, loneliness will become your natural state.
And to wrap up our ranking of the most harmful advice, I want to draw your attention to the fact that if you continue to treat yourself with even a semblance of love, you are unlikely to become truly unhappy.
So remember the most important harmful advice for all time: never, under any circumstances, love yourself! Don’t praise yourself, don’t value your achievements, never treat yourself, and never buy anything that brings you joy!
Maybe then you will finally manage to turn into an emotional wreck and join the ranks of those who are sure that the world around them is extremely hostile.
Or is it their inner world that is hostile to them? Who knows?..