The state of vulnerability — someone avoids it, while someone who knows its true value allows themselves to live through it in order to emerge from it in a completely different, new capacity.
Read about the strength and power of the state of vulnerability, and how not to drown in it.
What vulnerability means in the literal sense
We have had many wounds throughout life, and no matter how much we heal them, scars remain. These scars are covered by the dam of our heart — that most powerful flow of love that emanates from it.
Interaction with the soul occurs only from the heart; accordingly, when your heart is closed, what speaks within you?
When asked how to determine a true desire or whether it comes from the mind, it is important to understand what is happening with your heart.
In order to shed this blockage, this armor that has grown around the heart, that state appears which is called vulnerability.
We are very afraid of being struck when we are weak. We often do not tell even close people certain things about ourselves, because we fear being misunderstood, we fear that it will later be used against us, we fear being hit back.
Therefore, everyone always has a certain filter depending on their experience. There is an inner circle of people, there is an outer circle of people with whom we share something, but still we are never naked, transparent to everyone.
My frequent example about the world of telepaths: if people read everything just by looking at you, and you are in this state of nakedness, you feel discomfort from it, because everything you have inside, all the emotions you are experiencing, the thoughts swirling around, suddenly become visible.
As a society, as a civilization, we are not ready for such a level of acceptance of nakedness.
Because one person will smile and say “well done,” another person will immediately judge you because of their own issues, someone else will be filled with complaints, and so on.
We live in a very imperfect world and use very imperfect laws.
See also Why It’s Important to Keep Your Heart Open
The Task of the State of Vulnerability
Our soul speaks to us only when the heart is open; the mind loses its grip of control, while the open heart uses any opportunity to chip away at this armor. And at that moment, there is a feeling that you are being turned inside out.
Imagine there is a well, and you need to empty it completely so that everything pours out, turns inside out, and then returns to a normal state, a state of acceptance. But you need to allow yourself to do this… and survive after it.
But we are afraid that we will be hit and cannot allow ourselves to be vulnerable because we consider it a sign of weakness.
Vulnerability is not about weakness, it is about strength and freedom. But for this, you will first be turned inside out, often through some serious situations, through the escalation of relationships. And there are moments when this dam spontaneously collapses: you watched a movie, read some post.
Now there is another turn on the topic of vulnerability, not related to opening the heart — the exposure of inauthenticity. Inauthenticity at the level of the mind, at the level of sensations.
Here it is important to learn to separate a person’s words and actions, so look at the actions.
Take the Awakened Heart meditation — to expand the capacity of your heart for the penetration of love in its highest manifestations.
How to Live Through the State of Vulnerability
1. Anchor yourself in the state you are in to avoid falling deep
Your task is not to fall deep, not to drown in these emotions and sensations, not to let your thoughts scatter, not to slip into a negative scenario. Try to switch yourself, anchor yourself in the state you are in, and you will see what happens next.
If you feel turned inside out, it is important to understand that a completely different level of perception of life opens up ahead. In these moments, you become closer to yourself and understand who you are from the perspective of your soul.
After all these states of experiencing vulnerability, the level of acceptance increases.
2. Use any tool for self-help
If you catch your breath, let it out, try to breathe through the throat chakra: inhale forward, exhale back, inhale to the right, exhale to the left.
Do several such cycles and you will feel better. A lump in the throat, pain — due to unspoken words.
Find your own tool. In my time, I used to say the phrase: “I have already thought this thought.” Turn off your thoughts. If the state of vulnerability is associated with a specific person, repeat it like a mantra: “I forgive, I thank, I let go.”
Some people sing mantras; they contain powerful vibrations.
See also Practices for maintaining balance
3. Do not blame the person who triggered this state in you
Do not try to blame the one who helped you enter this state of vulnerability. There is no fault of theirs in this.
In my time, I came up with a term related to personal relationships — “the hand of God.” It’s when a person’s brain shuts off and higher powers guide them.
They do certain things and have no idea how strange it looks from the outside, and then they come to their senses and wonder how they could have done or said all that.
Try to maintain this state without falling into self-pity, when you are not chosen, do not take it personally. It is not about you.
When someone does not choose you, it does not reflect on your actions; it reflects on that person. It has nothing to do with your self-esteem, nothing to do with how good or bad you are, nothing at all.
If you have fallen into a state of vulnerability, accept it as a gift that allows you to understand yourself, to feel from within who you are, what you are like, how you are connected to your soul, to your spirit.
See also Love is a gift. How to find it
When was the last time you were in a state of vulnerability, and what did you ultimately gain? We would be glad if you share your experience in the comments!
The article is based on a broadcast from the #conversation_on_the_couch #92 State of Vulnerability