Although we have already discussed the topic of need and lack many times, both in articles and broadcasts, today we will examine this concept in more detail from a spiritual perspective, using examples from different areas of life.
What is need, I need
As long as you are in need of something, you are deprived of it. This applies to material goods, money, as well as love, attention, and care.
Need means that you do not have it.
There is you as the center of your universe, and there is something out there that you need, without which you cannot be yourself, without which you cannot be the center of your universe.
Thinking this way, you are always in a vulnerable position, because as long as you do not have it, in your view, you are not as you should be, something is wrong with you. This means you are not the center of your universe. And until you get it, you will not be yourself.
If you need something, it means that at that moment you are not whole. You lack something inside, and you are trying to fill it with something from the outside.
It is like in relationships. Two halves complement each other. When you stop complementing someone and become whole, questions arise: why do I need a man?
But you need to start with this question. Why do you need an equal partner? This is not programmed in our minds, because all our lives we have been halves complementing each other. This is the principle by which we have lived for many years.
And it works the same way in the matter of need. Why do you need this or that?
I am not good enough, I am flawed, give me this, give me that. And here we enter the topic of consumerism.
If you have an unmet need, fill it yourself. Give yourself what you want to receive from others.
And to this, questions are always asked: “Then what is a husband for? Let him give flowers!”
He will give them when you close this part for yourself, because the tentacles reaching out from within you saying “give, give, give” will stop.
Then you will have a completely different state: I need it, I’ll go buy it for myself.
For example, I have no complexes or unresolved issues about this. I value myself so much that while walking down the street, I can buy flowers and happily give them to myself.
But if you are in need, you will sit and remember the last time he gave them to you, and then you will take offense and start a scandal.
Which picture are you for?
The paradox is that when you are filled from within, whole, and do not need something, it begins to come on its own. When you untie something inside yourself, you stop needing.
See also: To need or to want. A simple algorithm that will help you become whole and take responsibility for getting your “wants.”
Example with a fur coat. How to allow yourself what you want
At the kindergarten my daughter attended, there was a mother of a boy with whom I discussed the topic of life after death. Her mother had died, she was very upset, and read a lot of literature on the subject.
I told her some things, about how you can ask for a signal, hints from your mother, from the universe.
She had a husband who was in business; he promised to buy a fur coat, but it never worked out: one thing or another. I told her that it wasn’t him limiting her, but that she was limiting herself, forbidding herself from ultimately having that fur coat: “It’s in your head that thoughts are spinning that no, it’s better to spend it on a vacation, on renovations, and so on. If money suddenly came your way, you wouldn’t go buy a fur coat.”
At that time, fairs came to Oryol selling fur coats and sheepskin coats. She went, saw what she wanted, and then she allowed herself.
She realized how great she would look in that fur coat. She came home, and her husband said: “Get ready, we’re going to the store to buy you a fur coat, an extra order came in, there’s money.”
This happened within a single day.
The same works with money. But as long as you live at the level of patterns, stereotypes, at the level of a victim of circumstances, when you believe that you are controlled by other people, by some external forces, all the mechanisms built into your creative potential do not work.
When you buy a phone, it has pre-installed default programs. You need to click on them for them to load. And we keep forgetting that we need to click.
How to let go of need in relationships
Fill yourself with love from within. When you try to replenish from the outside what you lack, you are going the wrong way.
Attain wholeness, self-love. For some, it may be unclear how to do this, but it is truly a long journey, an important part. Shift your focus to yourself, fill yourself from within, and you will not need love or attention from the outside.
This does not mean you will not need anyone, but you will stop looking at men, among others, from a place of need.
I recommend studying materials on wholeness:
- How to attain personal wholeness
- Why it is so hard to find a soulmate
- The process of returning to wholeness of self, or How to use your gift of love
How to let go of need for money if there is real need
As long as you believe you have a need, you will not have money. Why is there no money? Because of your limitations. And you are stuck in them.
Regarding working through limitations on the topic of money, there are now a huge number of specialists and materials. There are even entire lists of limiting beliefs—find one and see which of them are yours.
Check out our broadcasts on the topic of money, for example #106 About debts and loans.
I previously wanted to re-record a course about money, but changed my mind because when a person lives beyond their means, I have nothing to offer them. We live in different planes.
My main principle is if you haven’t earned it, don’t spend it.
I have nothing to offer those people who are stuck in debt. My words won’t reach them; I don’t know how to speak at that level, to motivate them not to buy.
We lived completely differently. There was no money for food; we ate buckwheat and fried potatoes.
And when someone writes to me: “I was walking down the street, saw a coat in a shop window, liked it, and took out a consumer loan,” I have nothing to say to such a person.
My tools won’t work for them. We have different values, including regarding material things.
We have a free course “The Laws of Money,” but it doesn’t help people get out of debt; it helps those who are on the edge.
Take it and you will learn why it is important to maintain equilibrium and balance when interacting with money, what the connection is between your self-worth and money, and much more. More details at the link >>
How to let go of the need to have a child
Answer yourself honestly: what are you trying to compensate for with a child.
Most often it will be: I don’t love myself, my life is worthless, and I need someone to be a light in the window.
Such an attitude blocks the arrival of a child in your life.
See also: 4 negative programs that prevent a woman from finding happiness
In which area of your life does neediness exist? Which limiting beliefs related to a scarcity mindset have you managed to free yourself from, and how?
Excerpt from the broadcast #AskKM 7, 01.12.2022