“The desire to judge disappears when you understand the true essence of the situation for you personally, the pearl of the situation. When you understand that all participants in any events are merely pawns on the large chessboard of your life, and only you decide, through your choices, where these pawns will be moved — for your benefit or to your detriment.”
Olga Lyudera
This is the second article about judgment. In the first article, you learned what judgment is from a spiritual perspective and where it leads.
Judgmental behavior is an addiction, a bad habit that is not easy to eradicate.
If you want to change your life for the better, solve problems with health and self-acceptance, make the decision not to judge.
Read below for how to help yourself with this.
How to Free Yourself from Judgment
If you have given yourself your word not to judge, be prepared that in the near future you will encounter judgment more often than usual.
This is because you are directing your attention to this area, and where attention is directed, energy flows.
#1 Make the Decision Not to Judge
Take responsibility for what you think and say upon yourself.
There is no one to blame, no one to judge. Everything you see and have in your life, you created yourself, no matter what the circumstances.
Pull yourself together and say to yourself:
“I am the Creator of my life. And with my gossip and judgment, I push the best reality away from myself indefinitely.
From this moment on, I make the decision to track disapproval, complaints, indignation, and other similar feelings and emotions.
I ask the Higher Powers to give me a signal when this destructive behavior begins to manifest, so that I can stop.”
A few seconds to decide how to behave will be enough.
#2 Eliminate Irritating Factors
First of all, to avoid falling into judgment, shield yourself from sources of negative emotions:
- Stop watching TV (news, talk shows). If something important happens in the world, you will find out about it anyway.
- Do not gossip, do not participate in discussions about the government, colleagues, acquaintances, or relatives with anyone.
- Reduce communication with people who complain often.
#3 Do Not Judge Yourself
If you catch yourself judging, do not judge yourself for it.
It is hard to give up such a habit right away, especially since our cells have absorbed these vibrations for so many years, and rewriting the information in them won’t happen quickly. Be understanding with yourself.
But do not encourage such behavior either. Do not indulge yourself. Do not think that since you have accepted it, you can keep gossiping. Remember the consequences.
#4 Find Out Why Another Person’s Action Upset You
As soon as you identify that you are judging someone, try to find the root — the shadow aspect. What exactly did you dislike about the other person’s behavior?
Ask your spiritual guides and Higher Self to show you a situation where you acted in a similar way.
If you can’t recall such a situation, perhaps you acted this way in past lives. Ask to be transported to such a past life.
When you see that you yourself behaved this way, you will understand that you were not judging another, but yourself. And that person was reflecting this behavior back to you.
Find out what lies behind your shadow from the material “Why Some People Annoy You for No Reason.”
#5 Learn to distinguish judgment from discussion
Judgment is backed by negative emotions, while discussion can be neutral — conveying information, stating facts.
Let’s compare two opinions expressed by two people about a movie they watched.
One says:
“The film didn’t explore the theme of relationships between a man and a woman, and it lacked action and events. But there were many beautiful scenes. Overall, I didn’t like the movie; I wouldn’t watch it a second time.”
The other opinion:
“Oh, what a boring film, the actors were terrible, I fell asleep halfway through. Why even make such nonsense? The director should be fired!”
Which one is judgment, and which one is a person expressing their point of view?
Not judging doesn’t mean never telling anyone anything or not sharing impressions. Everyone has preferences, and if we don’t like something, it doesn’t mean we are judging.
Value judgments are familiar to us; we grew up and live in a polar world.
That’s why many spiritual people hit a dead end: “If I’ve decided not to judge, but I don’t like something, does that mean I can’t talk about it? Isn’t that a judgment?”
When we talk about something, as in the example, sharing impressions from watching a movie, what matters is the energy we put into the story.
In the second response, you can see that the energy is negative. It’s clearly judgment and value judgments.
A person who is planning to watch this movie will already have a biased opinion formed in advance. They will watch it through the lens of that statement.
Value judgments create limitations and distort reality. A movie might be boring for one person but interesting for you.
In the first example, the person shares their impressions but doesn’t impose their opinion. They didn’t like the movie, but that’s their taste and preference.
Learn to see the difference. You can discuss anything as long as you don’t cross the line: don’t impose your point of view, don’t make it personal, don’t bring in negative emotions.
#6 Learn to feel the boundary between judgment and discussion
If you are discussing some event in the lives of acquaintances, learn to feel when you cross into judgment, when negative emotions are added.
Those who already practice spiritual disciplines have learned to feel energy flows; you will notice the moment when energy begins to drain.
If it doesn’t work right away, you will see it after the discussion, feeling tired, a drop in energy levels.
You can learn about the benefits of spiritual practices here: “What Spiritual Practices ‘Threaten’ You With.”
How to stop judging murders, wars
Every event, no matter how terrible it may seem, has a higher meaning. It’s not necessary to try to comprehend it. It’s hard not to get drawn into judgment, but it is possible.
Ask yourself: “How can I help?” The Universe will definitely offer you plenty of options.
If you are distressed about a war between neighboring countries, help refugees with money, food, clothing, or hygiene products.
If you feel sorry for homeless animals, go to the nearest shelter and adopt a kitten or puppy. If that’s not possible, buy some pet food and donate it to the shelter.
If you can’t help physically, send the person you’re worried about energy of love and support.
And stay in a harmonious state, because with your worries and negativity, you definitely won’t help.
On May 9, 2015, Alena Starovoytova had the idea to hold a War Trauma Ceremony.
The participants, led by Alena, Tatyana Fomicheva, and Maris Dresmanis, stood in a Circle of Light to heal the pain of war. Then those who wished took part in burying crystals in different corners of the planet.
To see what came of this, look here: “War Trauma Ceremony. One Year Later.”
What to do if people are judging in your presence
How not to get drawn into judgment if people are complaining or expressing dissatisfaction in your presence:
- Change the subject of conversation. If that’s not possible, leave.
- If you’re at work, step out of the office and take a walk while the conversation is going on. If you’re in a public place (transportation, government office), carry a player and headphones with you and put on some pleasant music.
- When loved ones or people you live with try to involve you in judgment, explain that the topic doesn’t interest you.
- If you’re a guest, you can’t dictate to the hosts what topics they should discuss. Leave the room, go play with the children. And in the future, stop visiting such people.
Here are two ways to stop the flow of gossip and judgment, from our readers:
A recommendation from Olga Ludera.
Where your thought goes, your energy flows.
If your thoughts are judgmental, energy leaks away; if they are creative, it fills you up.
Judgment or a critical opinion is a kind of disturbance, an emotion that takes away energy.
Think about it: aren’t you judging those people who are judging someone else? And perhaps you are even subconsciously judging yourself for evaluating those who judge others?
Thoughts like “They are judging, and that’s bad; I won’t take part in it” are equivalent to saying they are bad. And bad and good are value judgments.
As a result, I evaluated someone’s behavior, which means I judged them.
Accept the fact that people have the right to behave however they want. It is their choice. Every person is neither bad nor good; they are at their own stage of development.
When a small child makes a mistake, you don’t judge their action; you accept the fact that they will grow up and won’t act that way anymore.
It’s the same with adults — they will understand at a certain time that by judging, they harm not the person in question, but themselves.
An Algorithm for Healing from Spiritual Pride by Alena Starovoytova
Egoic pride is a side effect of spiritual development.
There is a category of people who have not fulfilled themselves either as individuals, as women, as men, as workers, or as parents. Although many of them are warm-hearted, kind people.
Having admitted their complete worthlessness and being afraid to acknowledge it, they assert themselves at the expense of others.
This gives rise to spiritual pride: “I am so spiritual, and they are cattle, nobodies, ‘3D-ers’.”
When judgment kicks in, it is the very last bell on the path to spiritual enlightenment.
There is a line of the surf — there is a happy, calm, harmonious life where I have achieved a lot within myself. And there is the reality that was “before.”
The boundary is precisely judgments. This is what many people stumble over.
The algorithm for getting rid of spiritual pride consists of two stages:
Stage 1 — Realize that you are being guided by spiritual pride
Ask yourself the question: “Why did I decide that I am better?”
Meditate on it at night and in the morning, without fail: “And why did I decide that this blatant 3D is worse than me?”
If you truly want to overcome this “ailment,” you will receive an answer.
Stage 2 – Ask for forgiveness
Ask for forgiveness from those people you considered to be worse.
Do it in person if you voiced your complaints and dissatisfaction to them out loud. Or use one of the spiritual tools you possess.
In this case, the Pyramid of Power and Light of Archangel Michael works effectively. Invite the people you have judged there and ask for their forgiveness.
Based on materials from the accompanying webinar for clients of the “Keys of Mastery” Training Center for July 2013.
If you haven’t yet created your personal Pyramid of Power and Light, find out how to do it from this material: “How to Make Your Own Pyramid of Light and Power.”
The habit of judging, dividing everything into bad and good, into black and white, has been instilled in us since childhood by society, starting with parents, kindergarten, school, and in adult life by the state, television, mass media, etc.
Therefore, before looking for someone to blame for your troubles, think about what YOUR actions, emotions, and words created such a present. Do you want the same future?