You have worked hard on yourself, clearing away the rubble of the past, raising your self-esteem and sense of worth. But in a conflict situation, you couldn’t maintain your balance and fell into negativity.
You went through a deep personal transformation, felt your strength and wings on your back. And then a terrible setback.
You learned to love yourself and put yourself first. But at the crucial moment, you couldn’t set a boundary and say a firm no when someone tried to use you in the old way.
You believed in your dream and took certain steps to make it happen. And you met serious resistance; all your efforts led nowhere.
And then you…
1) Focus on what went wrong.
You get angry at yourself.
You feel guilty.
If only I could have answered differently…
If only I had listened to my friends’ advice.
And then you…
2) Take everything personally.
You are disappointed in yourself and drowning in doubts.
Maybe this isn’t for me. I don’t deserve this.
Someone else deserves a real life, but I… this isn’t about me and not for me.
Maybe I made it all up, and time quickly put everything in its place.
Why do I always want something more? Others just live and don’t think about anything.
And then you…
3) Want to give up on everything.
You want to throw it all away, letting your hands drop.
You want to hide from everyone to be alone.
How could I have even aimed for something like that?!
You feel guilty that you didn’t manage.
Imperfect.
Tiny and insignificant.
But the thing is…
1) You have gained so much along this path.
You’ve figured out exactly where not to go.
What not to waste your time and energy on.
You’ve met amazing people.
Who value you for who you are.
Not for your achievements and results.
Who respect your views and honor your choices.
Who will always support and understand you.
And…
2) This has nothing to do with you personally.
Everyone reacts based on their own wounds and traumas.
People get annoyed when others do things they would never allow themselves to do.
That is their choice, which should be treated with respect and acceptance.
You choose your own path, and it doesn’t have to match the path of your loved ones.
And then the question arises…
3) How can you look at the situation from a different angle and step outside of black-and-white thinking?
What did I learn from this situation?
What did I gain in return?
What unconscious part of me did these people illuminate?
What can I do to constantly remain in harmony and balance?
In what other ways can I express my uniqueness?
As Thomas Edison said: “I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.”