I believe that working through one’s lineage and doing something with it is necessary for only one percent of people, those who either have some kind of ancestral issues or a repeating scenario from grandmother to mother to granddaughter, where there are serious problems.
But now, from every corner, no matter what you touch, everyone is talking about working through your lineage.
However, if the majority doesn’t need to do this, it doesn’t mean you shouldn’t accept your lineage.
Read why it is important to accept your lineage and parents.
Why is it important to accept your lineage and what is your lineage to you
As long as you do not accept your lineage as a whole, or some of its individual representatives, you do not feel the strength of the lineage behind you.
To feel their strength, there must be acceptance of the lineage as a whole.
For me, instead of the word “lineage,” the word “ancestors” always comes up. I feel a strong connection with my ancestors when I ask them to line up behind me. This is a Slavic word, and it reflects the essence.
You can accept the lineage as a whole, even without accepting individual representatives. It is good when you accept everyone, even if you disagree with them or they do not love you. But if you cannot, approach it through deeper layers, through the ancestors.
For me, lineage is not about father and mother. For me, father, mother, brother, sister are family.
Lineage for me is everything else; it is not even about the living, but about those who have already crossed the threshold.
And how is it for you? Does family fall under the concept of lineage?
Mother is wealth, father is money. What is the difference
I first heard from A. Palienko that mother is wealth, father is money.
My favorite saying, “a bird cannot fly with one wing,” implies that everything must be balanced: the material and the spiritual. When you lack one of the two wings, some part of your life suffers.
How do you understand the difference between wealth and money?
Wealth (mother) includes money, but it is not just money; it is a broader concept. I would even say not wealth, but well-being. Well-being — a person who is accomplished or a state of goodness. There is much to ponder. However, the ability to earn money is directly connected to the father.
Therefore, when you are in a state of unforgiveness toward your father, your finances suffer greatly. This does not mean that your money situation is entirely bad; it means you are not reaching the financial opportunities you could have if you had forgiven and accepted your father, sometimes for completely inappropriate behavior.
I never had problems with my mother, but it was difficult for me to forgive my father after certain situations. And I had to seriously work on this, to establish some kind of communication, because there was no desire to interact.
If you treat your father unseriously, say he is a clown, a windbag, the same attitude is projected onto money.
If you want to build a relationship with money, you must respect it. And how can you respect it when you do not respect your own father?
See also How to let go of poverty — can a spiritual person be poor
Forgiveness and gratitude toward parents from the perspective of a conscious person
Comment: “It is not enough to forgive; you need to understand their role in my life, find something to be grateful for.”
You don’t need to find something specific; just be grateful.
Try doing this in writing. When you start writing, the flow opens up.
Gratitude is the currency of the fourth dimension. Be grateful for different stories, for the lessons you learned from unpleasant situations involving your parents. As a result, growth and uplift happen very quickly.
Subconscious childhood grievances affect the flow of finances. We place restrictions on ourselves. It’s not that our parents were such bad radishes who tried hard, but rather we, when we don’t accept the past, or don’t accept some of our own past behavior, or don’t accept our parents’ behavior toward us. And as a result, these blocks appear, including mental ones.
But if things are good now, it means you are not running into the past and it does not surface in your heart. After all, the main indicator is when you are upset, drained, irritated — say something to you and see what pours out in response. That’s exactly when everything that was previously suppressed by the mask of a good girl comes out: “I won’t offend them,” out of a sense of conscience.
But this is not a reason to think that they are all such jerks; it is a reason, when you return to a resourceful state, to look — perhaps you need to clean up these loose ends so that you don’t keep diving into this unaccepted, unlived, unprocessed, unhealed past over and over again.
See also How to learn to truly forgive grievances
Collective creation. Acceptance of parents as partners
There is such a concept as collective creation.
Our favorite trap in the “Dance with the Shadow” course — it seems like you’ve already untied it, already realized it, already done everything you could, but next to you is a person who ignores all of this, who couldn’t care less. And you begin to see how their red buttons, triggers, and tripwires are activated. But you cannot interfere due to the law of free will and choice.
So you work on yourself, but the person next to you either hasn’t worked through these topics at all or has only partially worked through them. Most often, this manifests as grievances toward parents or a disrespectful attitude toward one parent. We cannot force them, only nudge, encourage, and remind.
It’s impossible to force someone to work through something; the person must express the desire themselves, must want to.
But the family has a shared field. It happens that there is some kind of collective creation. For example, going somewhere on vacation to some overseas country, or buying an apartment, selling land. Something that concerns the entire family.
And you seem to have already felt everything for yourself, created an image of what the outcome will be, and even entered into the state, but it just isn’t moving forward because the collective creation is at play.
You have accepted and forgiven your parents, but your partners (husband, wife) have not. So it turns out that the realization of a common goal or plan gets stalled.
But you can be that solution-person for your partner, and he, being in your field, reads it. And this might lead him to changes, including in his relationship with his parents.
To Forgive or to Ask for Forgiveness
Forgiving parents is necessary, even if you never knew your father or mother.
Not knowing and not respecting are two different things. You can never see a person but feel immense respect or gratitude toward them, because thanks to them you came into existence.
This is possible if, in childhood, no nonsense was poured into your ears, or later in adolescence you didn’t come up with the idea yourself that you were unwanted, abandoned, and so on.
You must forgive, not ask for forgiveness. Imagine that you chose with your soul the experience of being raped, and then your whole life couldn’t let a man touch you, or you chose to be a murderer and paid for it your whole life.
Do you think it will be easy for your ego-personality just because somewhere out there you made such an agreement?
People would not spend so much money on psychotherapy and all kinds of therapy if it were so simple to untie all those knots and leave them in the past.
But unforgiveness destroys, hatred destroys. Everyone has episodes for which they can forgive their parents.
It is impossible to be in your power, to be self-sufficient, when a bird is wounded or when both of its wings are not working.
We do this not for them, but for ourselves, in order to feel good, stronger, more powerful, lighter, without the burden of the past.
See also Forgiving yourself is an important step on the path to self-acceptance and connecting with higher wisdom
How are you with forgiving your parents? What does clan and kin mean to you?