Value. What does this concept mean?
Value is your attitude toward yourself, how much you love and accept yourself.
After all, you’ve probably noticed this paradox in your life more than once. If you criticize yourself, then critics surround you in life as well. And conversely, if you’re in a good mood, ready to help and support everyone, then similar people gather around you.
Truth be told, there are as many opinions on this as there are people. But several key unifying points of feeling your own value can be highlighted.
Read about them in this article.
Three Components of Feeling Your Own Value
1. What I do is valuable
What reaction did this statement trigger in your body?
Let me give a few examples from my clients’ responses.
“What could be valuable about me sleeping all day and not doing anything useful?” one of my clients once asked, and at that very moment felt shame for following his body’s need and desire.
To which he immediately received the answer: “Sleep gave you peace, rest, and a surge of new energy, didn’t it?”
Let’s go back to the beginning of your choice. You were tired and decided to give your body a rest. Is that bad or good? Undoubtedly good.
After all, if you ignore your body’s need and go do something “useful,” in your or your household’s eyes, no one wins from that.
Conclusion: valuable are those actions that create a resource within you, nourishing your body and soul.
See also How to Realize Your Feminine Value
If you truly value yourself, you effortlessly handle any problems and challenges of fate; your desires come true as if by magic; people love and respect you, reflecting your inner state.
Read which 10 tips will help you learn to value yourself.
2. My inner state matters
This point is more addressed to women, but it will also be useful for men to read.
From morning till night, you are like a hamster on a wheel, working, running around, solving important issues—in short, doing a ton of useful and necessary things throughout the day.
In the evening, you come home, and there, urgent tasks and worries are also waiting for you, which you take on despite your exhausted state.
As a result, you are drained, tired, and angry. In this mood, you go to sleep.
Tell me honestly, what would be better for you personally: a calm partner or a dissatisfied and irritated one?
A rhetorical question—each of you understands the answer. So why do you consider yourself guilty the moment you hear the needs of your body and follow them?
Who forces you to constantly make a choice not in your favor, but in the opposite direction? Do you really think life will collapse if you do everything calmly and with inspiration?
I am sure that if you ask men what they need from women, few will answer: food and cleanliness.
In my lifetime, I have met men who unanimously insisted that they need a woman-friend with whom they can talk, share what is on their soul, and she will listen and understand with full acceptance.
Men need not only a clean home but also your love, acceptance, warmth, and tenderness. Where is it supposed to come from when you stubbornly turn yourself into a perfect robot?
Most men have already come to the conclusion that they need a sensual, alive, real woman. They can buy household appliances themselves, clean and cook together with you, or even alone, if it gives them a calm, loving, and caring woman.
Someone will probably think this is impossible. Then I will say: everything you believe in is possible.
See also: The Resourceful Woman, or Where Your Resources Are Hiding
Use 11 sources of restoration and preservation of feminine energy.
3. Who am I and what is truly valuable for me in life?
And here’s where it gets really interesting.
The second you ask yourself this question, you open the door to your own unique world, unlike anything else.
I’ve been on a journey of self-discovery my whole life, no exaggeration. Since childhood, the talent of my heart was revealed to me — to love without conditions. Then, I was told that it was foolish to love everyone and that people didn’t deserve it.
And of course, I believed that and hid my world from others. Later, from all sides, I was told what I needed to change about myself to become like everyone else.
Alas, I listened and reshaped myself to suit the tastes of those around me. But they were still dissatisfied. So I just closed myself off and stopped listening to anyone. It was a kind of rebellion.
And only over time did the sacred meaning of valuing myself become clear to me.
Being yourself — that’s what truly matters. What’s the point of doing something that brings you no pleasure, no joy, and stirs no feelings at all?
Looking at people who enjoy their actions, you might mistakenly assume that it will bring you pleasure too.
Each of us has experienced mimicking the actions of others to feel that same inspiration, that enjoyment. Right?
And I’ll say without a shadow of a doubt, you didn’t get it. You wondered what you did wrong and were left disappointed.
You’re probably familiar with that feeling of disappointment in yourself when something doesn’t work out. You start looking for the cause within yourself. And you’re right.
The cause is in you, and in the fact that instead of finding what fills you up, inspires you, and brings you pleasure, you concluded that the issue was with the object, the action, the deed.
But the thing is, you got exactly what you wanted.
Try the meditation “Being Yourself. How to Express Your Truth with Love.” It will help you release the energy, emotions, beliefs, and limitations that prevent you from being yourself.
I enjoy a latte. But there are people, and not a few, who don’t drink coffee and enjoy tea, for example. And it’s not about the coffee or the tea.
It’s precisely about the fact that it’s what you want, and you’re doing it.
My whole life, my family and loved ones tried to impose their vision of life on me. And it was very easy to follow their advice. No responsibility — if something went wrong, I could blame them and be content.
The bravest thing for me is to journey into my own world, get to know it, find what is truly valuable to me, and only then find peace.
When you know who you are and what is valuable to you, that is exactly what you will receive.
So, if you are searching for yourself, that’s wonderful. Keep tasting this life, follow your desires and aspirations.
Only then will life be interesting for you, and you will be meaningful to others.
See also: Belief in Yourself as the Foundation of Your Life
Everything we do, everything we create, is built on belief in yourself; it is the foundation of our relationship with ourselves and the world around us.
Remember, you are valuable. Your life and experience are unique and necessary. Dare to live the way you want, and the world will surely support you. Good luck on your journey!