Many people want changes in their lives without realizing that first and foremost they need to change themselves.
If we say that the world begins with you, it means you change yourself, and the world then reflects this in the external environment.
Read about why people so desperately want change but are afraid to change themselves, and how life’s challenges can be beneficial.
What to do when you want changes in life
Comment: “But what if there is a desire to change life, yet nothing changes, how to deal with this?”
You can wish as much as you want, but if you do not start changing your life yourself, nothing will change.
You must not wish, but change. Choose one area of life that you are not entirely satisfied with, and change it. If you need to prepare a safety net, then prepare the safety net, then take action.
What does this mean? If you want to earn more, but have exhausted all options at your current job, you do not quit into the void, but look for another place, and only then make the transition.
Or in relationships. If you are unhappy in your marriage, you do not slam the door, but prepare the ground (mentally prepare your family, think about where and how you will live), and only then take the decisive step.
See also Changes in life. What they mean for you
Going in circles
Nothing changes around you when you do not change within. This is a common theme during transformations.
What do people do? They tread the same ground, go in circles year after year, attend self-development trainings, personality discovery sessions, talent revelation workshops, and purpose-finding seminars, yet the cart remains stuck in the same place.
There is no key moment — you haven’t made the leap. You keep walking the same closed circle with a drum and a flag, but it’s still the same closed circle. To bring about change, you must jump out of yourself.
Nowadays, there are many trainings that induce a state of catharsis, i.e., with shock therapy. But you can constantly expand and move forward without harshness.
Why don’t you change? Most likely, you’re afraid. It’s a habitual reaction — what if it gets worse.
Growth Through Challenges
Comment: “I burn out quickly; at first, everything is on fire, everything rushes, but after a while, it’s no longer interesting.”
In school, children are given problems. There are several levels: a simple problem that anyone can handle, even for a C grade; there are stable problems that a good student can handle; and there are problems of increased difficulty that not even an A student can solve, but only someone whose mind is wired for it.
I wasn’t interested in tasks for everyone; I was called to the board when no one else could solve it because it was hard. I liked that; it shook up the mind.
But now I’ve realized there’s this thing — raising the level of difficulty — it’s cool, it’s some kind of challenge.
But many people don’t know how to adequately perceive a challenge because there’s a picture stuck in their head: if I’m so spiritual, everything should be pink and chocolate, marshmallow and marmalade, with no obstacles, no collisions. If I hit a wall, it means I shouldn’t go there.
This is a program, a virus in the consciousness that you need to knock out of yourself, because it is through challenges that you grow, through challenges you become wiser, and as a result of challenges, energy begins to move.
And if you give up at the first difficulty, there is no development, no evolution, just that same walking in circles of life. Nothing changes because you run from challenges, you take the path of least resistance. Challenges are necessary.
All last summer we were in such an unusual state: a wall here, a wall there, but that was not to make you stop, but to make you go around.
If I stopped every time I faced an obstacle and said, “this is not for me,” then nothing would have happened.
See also Spiritual development, evolution and imitation of development — what is the difference — [answers to questions]
Female passivity — can I not be the one doing this
Comment: “Sometimes I dream: can I not be the one doing this?”
This is our request, a girly one. The masculine principle is more active, the feminine principle is more passive, this is about passivity.
But passivity is not about laziness or degradation. Because when life pressures you, you go and do it, and you do it easily. But there is an option to get stuck, when you spend a lot of time sitting around waiting for someone else to do it.
But time has accelerated, the number of events occurring per unit of time has accelerated so much. And there simply is no longer that opportunity to hang around for a long time.
Before, you could hang around for a year in a state of “in-between” and think, but now, excuse me, you fell asleep with one currency exchange rate, and woke up with another. And you think: you could have done this and that, but you didn’t. And if you had done it yesterday, today the result would have been completely different.
But instead of getting upset, as many do, make an algorithm for next time: one-two, go and do it immediately. But many get stuck in regrets. Acknowledge the fact: well, you messed up.
Write in the comments how you feel about challenges?
The article is based on broadcasts from the sections #разговор_на_диване and #спроси_КМ #145 Accelerated Transformation and #13 Ask KM