There are people who repeatedly find themselves in situations where borrowed money isn’t returned to them. Yet they keep lending money because they can’t say no.
Then they worry about it and judge the debtors.
Others, when lending, think they are helping someone. But is such help always for the good?
Let’s reflect on the topic of debts from a spiritual perspective. Read about the lessons people who lend money go through, as well as the debtors themselves.
Debt not repaid — how not to fall into negativity
There is a safety technique for dealing with debtors. If you lend money to someone, only lend the amount that feels comfortable to you, the amount you can forget about.
For some, that’s 1,000 rubles, for others — 20,000 rubles. You give that amount and forget about it. It’s good when that money is in your life, but if it’s not, you don’t get upset. Then lending is okay.
If the amount exceeds your comfort zone, it’s better not to lend money, because you won’t get rid of the feeling of dependency and attachment to getting the money back.
Sometimes the situation repeats itself over and over. You lent money at 18 and didn’t get it back, lent it at 25 and didn’t get it back again, and again, and again.
What kind of program is this, where you give everything away and nothing comes back?
There are different degrees of soul maturity. For some, it’s enough to get into a situation once to never step on the same rake again. Others fall into the same situation several times.
In the past, a soul would work through one lesson over many lifetimes. Now we have the opportunity to work through many lessons in a single lifetime, which previously required multiple incarnations.
But sometimes there’s a blind spot — you fall into the same situation and don’t see it until you’re right in it. Though from the outside, it may be obvious to others because they aren’t caught up in it.
Therefore, if the same situation keeps repeating and you fall into it again and again, this is your theme to work through. If you resolved the situation the first time, it means your soul already has that experience, and it’s already been processed.
When you constantly lend money and don’t get it back, it points to an inability to defend your boundaries.
In Steve Rother’s book “Spiritual Psychology,” different lessons are well laid out, including learning to say “no,” setting your boundaries, and being able to determine what matters to you — whether you’re doing something for yourself or for someone else. And why it’s important to always put yourself first.
If large sums of money haven’t been returned to you several times, and your business suffers as a result (plus many end up in this situation with the same people), determine what’s truly important to you, where your priorities lie, and learn to say “no.”
See also Why is there no money? The vow of poverty and other spiritual causes of financial problems
Why sometimes you shouldn’t wait for a debt to be repaid. Attitude toward small debts
Some people find it easier to treat debtors this way: if they didn’t return 500 rubles, I’ll just consider that I paid that money to not be bothered. That is, they essentially turn the debt into comfort.
But the meaning is different. You are not paying for comfort. You simply helped a person, which means you don’t expect anything in return. 500 rubles can only become crucial for you if you have 10 rubles in your wallet.
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What to do about judging debtors
Many people, when they don’t get their borrowed money back, feel immense dissatisfaction.
When any destructive emotions arise, look at the picture from above or like a projection in a movie theater, to shift into the observer position.
You have a task – to learn something. Actors are hired for this task to act something out. People might want to walk past, but there is a program inside you that needs to be worked through. You attract people to match this program.
If you judge someone, feel irritation, disappointment, resentment, anger, or any negative emotions towards someone, you are programming people for a certain behavior.
The mechanism works – you, like a director, have written a role for people, and they cannot step out of this role because there is contempt, judgment, guilt, anger inside you, i.e., an emotion with a minus sign.
This emotion dictates how people will behave. When this emotion disappears, the connection that held people in this role is broken. And people immediately start behaving differently.
Ethereal gifts work the same way, when you mentally give something to someone, imagine the situation positively, and the person immediately changes their attitude towards you. People don’t understand this with their minds, but they read it energetically.
See also Judgment – how to free yourself from this habit
When and to whom it’s better not to lend money
It’s important to define your own criteria for when you give money and when you don’t. You should have an inner understanding of the parameters you use to see if you can give or not, if you want to give or not.
If a person is bad with money, instead of helping them learn their lesson, you help them by lending small amounts. If a person has the minimum for survival, this completely blocks any need to take action.
Some people have such a program built in. It manifests in inert people, those who lack passion and inner fire; these are executor-type people.
There are people – creators, who generate ideas, invest, and do things. And there are those who are told: “Do step one, two, three,” and they won’t think that they could do three and a half and, God forbid, four. These are great executors. They will do everything needed, but without a drop of initiative.
For such people, there is a life lesson called money problems. It is needed to spur a person into action. This program is recorded by the soul of such people to stimulate them. Otherwise, they will sit and wait, but a rolling stone gathers no moss.
Based on this soul plan, they constantly have money problems.
It happens that money is earned, but some confluence of circumstances occurs where they invest it in the wrong place, give it to someone, or lose it along the way. Even if such people rise up, a fall follows. Because the only stimulus to move is when they have no money.
Money is a powerful lever. And if such a person is periodically given money as a loan, even small amounts, the stimulus disappears. There is enough to survive. The most minimal needs are met, and that is sufficient.
For women who are left alone with children in their arms, or who experience a tragedy in relationships, or who are left without work, this is a powerful stimulus. On the one hand, it can be painful and traumatic, but on the other hand, such women quickly achieve success because there is a stimulus.
And conversely, if there is, even small, child support, then the person continues to drift through life without interest or passion. And this is incompatible with the current energies.
See also How to help parents with money while maintaining your boundaries
And what is your attitude towards debts? Do you give/borrow money?
The article uses answers to questions from the course “Money Flow 2.0” (discontinued)